Q: Hi I am currently going through a very hard situation I understand what you have said that marriage without parents consents is not valid but I want to ask what if your parents are really racist against another culture even to extent that when one thing bad happens they blamed it on that culture.. and they do not show respect to that culture and say all sorts about them not only to you but to everyone they meet that there culture is really bad when really in Allah’s eyes we are all one ummah… I want to marry this Pakistani boy who is a strongly committed Muslim and is very modest but my parents refuse just because he is a different culture to me .

Time: July 16, 2015 at 4:53 PM

A: There is a word in Arabic called Asabiyyah. It is a very important concept to understand. The best way to understand it is through the following hadith: Rasool (SAW) was asked, ‘Is it tribalism for a man (person) to love his people?,  He (SAW) said: ”No, tribalism is to support your people in an unjust cause.’ (Ahmad)

To support people based on race/nationality alone is wrong. We must support people based on good intention that they couple with good actions. Likewise, the people we marry should also have good intention that is proven by good character.

Explain this hadith to your parents. Additionally, show them how people from all walks of life do good as well as make poor choices.

Allah Certainly Knows Best.