Q: I am in Sunday school. I asked you’re the question. When you answered I could not hear the answer because of noise. So can you please answer it again.

I have a good friend. We r friends for 3 years. We have sleep sleep overs. go to pray. we eat lunch. Everything together. even sports together. Our grades were great… But lately my grades are going down. my mom is upset that i did not turn in my assignments. All she talks about is guys, clothing, fashion, hair style and guys. And in one Friday you said listen to what people have said and listen to what they say now. doing this I noticed that she lies a lot about guys. She even wears my other friends jewery and tells everyone its hers. Guys did not even asked her oiut. All the guy did was say hi and ask her where she is from. She is my friend and I really don’t know what to do about this. It is like drama drama and drama everyday. I even don’t want to see her anymore but I feel that would be rude.

Please help me imam.

Time: November 23, 2015 at 6:59 AM

A: I appreciate your question. Distractions will always come your way. Shaytans task is to distract you so you become a failure in what you are seeking to achieve. Shaytan wants you to drop your higher goals for lower ones. Shaytans ploy is to never see a person succeed. This way you live an unfulfilled life. So how does shaytan achieve this?

Shaytan attacks everyone in a different manner. He gets you distracted from your immediate goals and makes you focus on things that are of lessor benefit. For example, if he gets you focused on boys when you are only 13, what good is it? It is not like you can go and get married to him right away. And statistically, within our current environment such relationships never last or create any long-term good in a persons life anyway.  Likewise, what good is focusing on your hair beyond that which is necessary. Your ‘hair’ time can be better spent of learning for an exam. Attention seeking may have benefits, however, it should never be at the expense of your grades and your faith.

Therefore our advice is simple: Some people function as representatives of shaytan. They may work directly for shaytan and may never know it. Now I am not calling for your friend a shaytan. However, shaytan appeals to certain people to make them distract others from achieving what they need to achieve. Therefore you should establish rules around your friend.

• Agree that school is a place of study. Encourage her to keep the topics focused on education. Agree that both of you can do homework, review for exams together, do all your school stuff together. When she goes of topic, try to bring your friend back to what is necessary.
• If after trying, you feel that she is not allowing you to focus on your school tasks, politely start to excuse yourself from her. In no way should you disrespect her. Be polite. Say your salam to her and move on to that which is necessary. You are too young to live a drama filled life. Drama only sucks out your positive energy and makes you live an unfulfilled life.

May Allah (swt) bless you and always help you in doing the right thing, amen.

Allah Certainly Knows Best.