Know Your Deen

Islamic QA for North America

experimenting is fine *between spouses*, breaking your cherished values is not

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Q: I just wanted to ask when a man and women are married in islam is it allowed for a husband to experiment with sex on his wife? For example they live in a modern society and its common for mens to pick up on different types of sex positions or even sex desires. However if the wife doesnt feel comfortable with things that the husband is desiring to do and sometimes she has no choice but to do it, is that allowed? The desires that the husband is wanting is more what he had seen in a porn video so i won’t mention what they are. but to be honest they are sick so please give me an answer if a wife to obey his commands on such things which makes a wife feel sick and she is told to do without a choice. i know a wife should fulfill her husbands satisfaction, but is he allowed to do all this? Thanx.
A: We are living in a society where watching things that are haram has become the norm. For a healthy relationship, you both should eliminate viewing that which is haram. In later life it would affect your relationship as well as the sexual health of your relationship.  (Read our response on pornography.)
A man and woman can do whatever they chose as it releates to sexual positions and loving making, so long as they enter into places that are halal. Sodomy is not permissible in Islam. Likewise, there is not need for obedience when the laws of Lawmaker is violated. So safe guard the integrity of yourself and marriage, you adult related matters must better negotiated by you and your partner.
If you do not feel comfortable due to pain, etc. explain this to your husband. I am sure he would listen to your request.
Allah Certainly Knows Best.
(Dictated by author.)

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